I was just about done Christmas shopping. It has been so long since I shopped for Christmas alone. This year, I had to. This year is a little different too, in terms of celebrating this fine, fine holiday. Yes, I will be coming home for Christmas. But I will not be celebrating it at my parents’ house. I’m not really dreading the holidays but I am not looking forward to it either. I just want to get this thing over with, you know?
My mom’s been nagging me about coming home for a while now. Even my aunt (her sister) has been nagging me about it. What I do plan is to go home, dump all the gifts I bought and spend the holidays alone. That doesn’t mean I’d have a bad time spending my supposed “favoritest” holiday ever. I just want peace and quiet, away from people who’s been nothing but a source of stress to me.
I used to live for Christmas shopping. Most people don’t know this but I love giving gifts. Christmas is a great excuse to splurge and just spread some cheer. This year, I think it’s gonna be a joyless celebration for me. Do I feel sad about that? Not the tiniest bit. I don’t feel compelled to surround myself with friends. I don’t feel the need to interact with people I’ve known all my life. I certainly don’t care to make peace with people who don’t deserve peace. Unfortunately, people won’t shut up when it’s Christmas. They automatically think just because it’s the fucking holiday all is well and good. It’s not. It will be the same day as it was the night before. Or the night after. And the night after that. Sorry, I’m rambling.
The point is, I’m so not looking forward to this. However, I want this thing over and done with. Quick and painless.