First off, a little shout-out to Arse Scenic! Porn Princess here wrote her first Inquirer article and it came out yesterday! Ya know, I never mentioned this to anyone but back in college, I dreamed of one day contributing to the Young Blood section of that particular daily so seeing Tin’s recent achievement really inspired this lowly writer to up the A especially at this crucial point of my professional life. Naks. No, really, I’m actually planning on starting big for the year ahead.
Thanks to the fact that there’s a chance that our company will be laying off some people (myself included) because of the whole recession extravaganza that’s been ripping the economic world a new asshole, I’ve done a lot of thinking. And no, it’s not because I’m paranoid.
Of course, this is mainly due to the fact that I’m partly frustrated at the way the management are “handling” this issue and partly unnerved at the prospect of celebrating the holidays without a job (a thing that has never happened to me before). However, a small part of me is happy because this is a great opportunity to think of all the possibilities and step up, something that I wasn’t able to do because of my hasty exit from Iweb.
But enough about that. I’m actually here because I wanna share something high-larious. So, I was rummaging through my closet and guess what I found! My long lost diary, college edition. See, I kept three diaries in this life time. The first one chronicled my elementary/HS life (the diary however, was destroyed when a flood drowned my home town back in 2004-ish) a college edition diary and a yuppie edition diary.
Excited that I was, I decided to read the whole thing, sure that the college me was not really different from the yuppie me. Well lo and behold, I was scandalized with its content and I wanted to burn the damn thing right away (which I didn’t). I sure as hell didn’t know I was a shameless flirt back in college. I wrote a freakin’ transcript of my conversation with a guy I was crushing on. If writing a three page transcript of my conversation with my crush isn’t weird enough, the convo was also generously peppered with godawful one-liners from yours truly. Susmeh, nakakahiyaaaaaaa!!! I read and and I was like, what?!
To give you a quick glimpse: Billy, is obviously the guy I had a crush on. He’s the part-owner of the Momo’s (a small restaurant) back in Dapitan.
Billy: Ah diba CEU ka? Babalik ako sa CEU sa 15. Kukunin ko kasi ang diploma ko.
College Tina: Ah talaga? Sige, antayin kita sa North gate, 14 pa lang magtatayo na ako ng tent! Pag nakakita ka ng tent, sakin yun, weheheheh!
ZOMG. It was so awful and I was so bad at it. I wanted to hop on a time machine, go back to the exact moment where Billy and I was talking and smack College Tina on the face with a fucking keyboard.
It’s funny really, because reading my diary made me realize two things, one, I’m bad at flirting, two, I’m even wose at stalking.
Oh, the shame! Oh, the shame! Oh, the shame!